——Thoughts on senior's clothes 由长辈的衣物想到的
After grandmother's funeral , my mother began to deal with grandmother's clothes. In our village, tradition has it that after the death of the elders, their clothes are mostly burnt away. After burning grandmother's clothes, my mom found a few pieces of her own clothes which my grandmother used. Mom found a tall tree in remote places,hanging these clothes on its high branches, meaning that her own fortune would get better and better.
In October this year, my partner took me back to his hometown Rome. His mother passed away quite early. She was a dentist, an outstanding independent professional woman. Her parents opposed strongly to her idea of getting away far from home to Rome to study and work, but she insisted. Later she met a gentleman who was also a dentist, and then they worked together to set up their own dental clinic. After that they had my partner.
My partner's mother was an amiably elegant woman, who was often invited to some high society social occasions, so she paid lots of attention to her clothing. Most of her clothes were tailor-made by well-known Italian designers then . Unfortunately, she suffered from diseases, and passed away early. My partner had always been very close to his mom, so this saddened him for very long time. He misses his mother, and he makes sure that most of his mother's clothes are well preserved. After so many years, he has been doing regular maintenance to his mother's clothing.
On the first night in Rome this time, my partner fondly looked at me and said:. "Now I've finally found my life partner who is so similar to my mom, not only physically but also spiritually. Physically, you and my mom are both elegant women, with similar height and size; Spiritually, you and my mom are both independent professionals, fighting for your own dreams, despite of countless obstacles, changing your life with your own efforts. Finally, now I've found a new owner of my mom's clothes. I am really happy . " Then he hugged me tightly, with tears in his eyes. I was so touched, full of happiness and gratitude.
My partner then asked me to try every piece of the clothes. For a few pieces that did not fit me perfectly, the next morning we took them to the local tailors to adjust according to my shape. The tailor was shocked to see these clothes, saying that these clothes can be taken to auction, as these were made by old famous Italian designers then, and now these designers are all gone.They should be super valuable now. Hearing this, my partner was very proud, pointing to me,and said: "yes, now they finally have a new owner to present and carry on their beauty, and I'm really happy."
Then we took these clothes to London. Now when I open the closet, seeing these fine clothes, I can't help thinking about my grandma's clothes in April. Both are elders' clothes, however the way they were treated was very different. Perhaps it's because of the cultural differences between East and West, or it may be due to the different social status of the two elders. But generally speaking, heritage is cherished more in the West. For example, regarding cultural heritage , most Western countries have long had the awareness of protection, however this is relatively recent in China. Another example is property purchase. In Rome,the older the property the more expensive it is, but in China it is the opposite; The same with furniture, I've been to a lot of Western friends' home, where many families have their grandparents' or great grandparents' furniture in their home, while in China, most families pursue new designer furniture.
Another common example is shopping. This September in Sicily, I came across a vintage shop, where the clothes were mostly old and classic, and most of them were already worn, but surprisingly this shop was very popular. My partner and I picked up a few pieces for me to try on. Meanwhile, he and the owner started chatting. Since this year the number of Chinese tourists abroad tops the world list, my partner asked out of curiosity: Chinese tourists must have brought you a lot of business, right? The owner, however shook his head repeatedly and said: there were some Chinese tourists who came to my shop, but they all left quickly, because they could not find the branded products here, such as Gucci or Prada. Honestly, almost no Chinese tourists consume in my shop.
In recent years,China's economic has been developing rapidly. The government's awareness of treasuring historical heritage has also been greatly improved, such as the protection of Beijing Siheyuan (traditional courtyard). But individually, most people are still chasing new fashion. Hopefully in the near future, more and more Chinese families would keep their grandparents' furniture, and more and more Chinese people would wear their parents' or grandparents' clothes.
Cherish the heritage, and treasure the history.
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今年四月回国探亲，到家之后立即马不停蹄地去外婆家看望外婆，去陪陪她，聊聊家常。外婆生在偏远的农村，今年身体欠佳已久，她说她一直强撑着，说是等着我回国来看她。果不其然，这次回国和外婆见面后，第二天晚上，外婆就安心地去了。我悲痛至极，第一次亲眼目睹一个活生生的人第二天变成一巨苍白僵硬地尸体，就那样安详地躺在棺材里。
外婆出殡后， 妈妈就开始处理外婆的衣物。我们这边的风俗是长辈去世后，他们的衣物大多都是给烧了。妈妈把外婆的衣物烧了之后，又发现有几件她自己的衣服，外婆用过。妈妈就把这些衣物拿到偏远的地方，找到一颗大树，把这些衣物挂在高高的树枝上，寓意就是她自己的运势会越走越高，越来越好。
今年十月我先生带我回他的老家罗马。先生的母亲去世得比较早。她在世时是一名牙医，是当时优秀独立的创一代女性。她父母当时很反对她远离家乡来罗马求学创业，但她还是不顾重重阻挠坚持了自己的梦想，后来遇到了同是牙医的先生的父亲，于是一起共同创立了自己的牙医诊所。后来就有了我先生。
先生的母亲是一位生性优雅的女人，再加上经常被邀参加一些上流社会的社交场合，于是对服饰着装的要求也甚高。当年她的服饰都是当时意大利的名设计师给量身定做的。只可惜她后来身患疾病，过世太早。先生一直跟母亲很相心，所以母亲的过早离去让他甚是忧伤。他很怀念母亲，将母亲的衣物一直良好地保存着。这么多年过去了，他一直都定期为母亲的衣物做保养。
这次回罗马的一个晚上，先生深情地看着我说：“ 现在我终于找到了一个和母亲形似且神似的人生伴侣了。所谓形似，你和我母亲身高体型都很接近；所谓神似，你和我母亲都是优雅之人，都为了自己的梦想拼搏，历经重重阻挠，通过自己的努力改变了自己的命运。现在我一直精心呵护的母亲的衣物终于找到了新的主人，我真的很开心”。说完他紧紧地抱着我，长长地叹了口气。我心里装的是满满的感动和幸福。
先生让我试了每一件衣服，稍有不合适地第二天就拿到了裁缝那按我地体型做修改。裁缝看到这些衣服时都惊呆了，说这样的衣服都可以拿去拍卖了，因为这都是当时意大利的老名设计师的作品，现在这些设计师都已经不在了，存留下来的服饰都价值不菲啊。先生听后一脸的骄傲，指着我说：“是啊，现在它们终于又有新的美丽的主人来传承它们的美了，我真的很高兴”。
后来我们把这些服饰带回了伦敦。 现在每每打开衣柜，看着这些高贵的服饰，都会想起四月回国时外婆的衣物的处理方式。同是长辈的衣物，其对待的方式却截然不同，或许是由于东西方的文化差异，也或许是由于两位长辈的社会地位的不同。但是总体上来讲，感觉西方人更珍重历史的传承。从大的方面来讲，比如说文化古迹，大多西方国家很早就有了对其的保护意识，而中国的这种意识则相对较晚。又比如说房子，罗马的房子是越老越贵，而在中国则恰恰相反；又比如说家具，我去过的好多西方朋友的家里都会摆有爷爷或是祖爷爷留下来的老家具，而在中国，大部分家庭追崇的是新的名牌家具。
再比如说购物，今年九月在西西里的时候，发现一家vintage的小店，里面的衣服都有很长的历史，而且大多都是已经穿过的了，但诧异的是这家小店的生意非常好。我和先生在此挑了几件，同时和店主人攀谈了起来。由于这两年中国境外游客数量居世界榜首，先生不仅好奇地问：中国游客给你带来了不少生意吧。店主人连连摇头地说：也会有中国游客过来看，但都是看了两眼就走了，因为他们看不到Gucci,Prada之类的名牌，又发现是老衣服，基本上没有中国的游客在我的店里消费。
这几年中国经济发展极速，政府对历史传承的珍重也有了很大的改观，比如对北京四合院的保护，对老房子的珍视。但是大多数个人的生活和消费观，都还是追新一族。真心希望看到越来越多的中国家庭摆放太爷爷用过的家具，越来越多的中国人穿上父母或爷爷奶奶穿过的衣服。
珍惜历史，珍重传承。
